Harvey Willgoose's mum still leaves murdered teen's school shoes by front door

The heartbroken mumof murdered teen Harvey Willgoose has revealed she finds it unbearable to go into her son's room because she "expects to see him there."

And she told how she still has her son's Kicker school shoes by the front door, his Canada Goose school coat hanging up nearby and clothes in the washing basket, six months after his murder.

Caroline Willgoose, 51, says she will never get rid of his belongings which are a constant reminder of her "amazing son" and doesn't think she will ever have the "strength" to move them.

READ MORE: 'Mass casualty' emergency at Wales beach as kids raced to hospital

READ MORE: Helicopter crash UPDATES: Isle of Wight pleasure aircraft 'spirals' to ground

The mum was speaking two weeks after a 15-year-old schoolboy, who cannot be named, was found guilty at Sheffield crown court of her son's murder. He is yet to be sentenced.

Her son was fatally stabbed through the heart in the courtyard of All Saints Catholic High School in Sheffield in February this year.

Devastated mum Caroline, has been campaigning for knife arches to be introduced in schools, since his death as she wants to stop other parents suffering the same "nightmare".

She said: "The pain is just horrific. I will never get rid of his clothes and stuff, you do forget for a brief time and then all sudden shocks you. I dream constantly about him. Sometimes it's about getting him up to get to school. Then at times I've woken up thinking it was all a dream, but then realise it's true. It's heartbreaking.

"The only way I can describe it is that it feels like when there's a sponge twisting, when you squeeze it, it's just horrible.. My heart is a muscle and it's this sudden pain, the crippling feeling I get, when a memory comes back."

Caroline, from Sheffield, who also has two other children, Sophie, 28, and Lewis, 26, said: "I've still got his school shoes and trainers by the door, his coats on the rack. His school clothes are still in our washing basket. I don't think I'll ever move them or have the strength to."

She has also revealed that his bedroom has been left unchanged but she has only managed to enter it around three times.

"His room is unchanged apart from when my husband Mark has tidied it up a little bit. His room was only small. The night before he died, he had stayed up all night, that is what he used to do sometimes before he went to school and had made himself a sausage sandwich and a glass of squash. Mark has taken that, and made the bed nice, and straightened things up a bit.

"There's his Sheffield United stuff and trophies on his windowsill next to his telly, his football medals around his door handle. He used to have his own team that he managed, which was made up of his friends.

"His door always remains closed, even if Mark goes in to have a cry, so he can feel close to him. However if he leaves the door ajar I have to shut it. I just expect to see him. I don't go in his room often. I have been in his room and laid on his bed and cried. I've only been in about three times. I try not to because I think it would be so easy for me to go into the room and simply not come out again.

"But I can't, I've got to keep going, I've got to keep going for the kids. I'm not ready for the door to be open yet as I don't even feel like I've touched the surface yet of grief.”

About the comfort she gets from his friends, the mum said: “Harvey’s friends have helped us loads. They keep checking in on us. They like to come and sit on Harvey’s memorial bench outside our house which is also under Harvey’s bedroom window. They send me photos and videos of them with Harvey having fun looking happy which is lovely to see.”

The family and friends have set up Harvey's Hub, a youth club at Beighton Miners' Welfare Club, in his memory and raised around £5,000 at the weekend during a memorial day.

"Two of his main friends will sometimes come to the club and just look lost. Harvey was their leader. I love to see them but we get really upset after. Mark started crying and they ran back in and gave him a hug. The other week I was sat watching telly and they knocked on the window and asked 'can we sit on his bench'. They are suffering too. They take his flag every match they go to, they take him with them everywhere they go. "

She is now working with some young rappers from Sheffield who are passionate about knife crime and "want to make a change. I would love to go into schools with them and educate the kids about the devastation of knife crime."

Since the trial Caroline and her daughter Sophie have been calling for her son’s killer to be named and “made an example of”. Caroline told the Mirror after the trial how she believes there were “at least five red flags” missed, which could have saved her son’s life. She was left stunned as she sat in court listening to the “many, many” red flags, which emerged during the trial. But when she heard he’d taken an axe into school she was left “flabbergasted’.

Since then she says children have told her they knew knives had been taken into All Saints Catholic High School in Sheffield.

It emerged during the trial, which she described as “mental torture,” her son’s killer was ‘obsessed’ with weapons, buying them on his parents’ credit card and smuggling them into school several times.

And she told us about her calls for more help to be given to ‘school avoiders’ like her son. For about a year, Harvey had regularly missed school because of his anxiety, and fears weapons were on site.

The week before his murder, there had been a lockdown at the 1,400-pupil school following a fight between a friend of Harvey's and a friend of his soon-to-be killer.

The defendant had insisted Harvey's friend had a knife on him, but police never found one. Harvey had not been in school that day. Two days later, on the Friday before he was killed, Harvey told dad this is why he didn’t want to go to school.

The following Monday, he summoned the courage to return - and was fatally stabbed in the chest by another pupil.

During a month-long trial at Sheffield Crown Court, his killer admitted manslaughter, but denied murder, arguing he had suffered a "loss of control" - saying his memory of what happened stopped "just before I stabbed him".